Speak Blog

There are many different ways that I define myself by. I define myself by the way I act around others, friends, and while I am alone. When I am with other people, I try to act respectable to what their “standards” appear to be, but with my true self driving it all along. Once I get to know those people, I begin to show my true self to them, but never actually fully open myself to them. When I hang out with my friends, especially close friends, I tend to be more open, and give my input towards other people. I tend to define my self while I am with friends, but many people don’t actually see my true self. I show the way I feel, by the way I interact with people, what music I listen to, and how much I reserve myself. I define myself as a person who really sits in-between everyone in actions, but definitely not in thought. I do not fit William James description from, The Social Me, because my peers do not influence my feelings, but instead just influence my actions, and how I present them. In the book, the characters all have different ways of showing themselves. Melinda uses her extremely reserved attitude to show that she is clearly holding onto something that she does not think anyone else should know about until later in the book, when she finally comes to peace with her past. Heather defines herself, by trying to goad Melinda into joining a club, because she has a total need to fit in with everyone, and become just a normal person. She truly fits directly into William James’ description, because she is completely dominated by the views of other people, her life is built around doing what she is told to by the other Marthas, and that she had given up all of her life to just join a “clan”, fit in, and attempt to become popular. Heather even goes as far to break her friendship with Melinda, because she is not social enough, has no want to be social, and Heather feels the she is being dragged down the social “ladder” by Melinda’s attitude and actions. The same goes for Rachel, who completely turned her back on Melinda too, but unlike Heather she joins the foreign exchange students. Rachel also fits perfectly into William James’ description of the “Social Me”, because she is dominated by the foreign exchange students, and will do almost anything, including throwing away her past and friends, to join the others.